In your child´s mind, you are the very best mum in the world

Who does this sound familiar to??! Before you even become mother, you are told how it is to be a mother and what the child needs. It makes you crazy which baby cot, which changing table and especially what stroller it should be. Brands as STOKKE or Bugaboo? Of course it has to be one of them, another does not even come into question, because at the moment it's the hottest and most exclusive design and you just want the best for your child, right? Or do you just want to be the BEST among the many mothers and especially stand out? 

Yes, I am one of the mothers who wanted only the best for her child. Now my little Noah is already 3 years old. Time flies by and I can tell you that the only thing he needs the most and certainly in the future is attention & love. Besides all the toys (and he has enough of that to equip a whole kindergarten), he is happiest when I show him how important he is to me and give him my attention. It's not the things a child memorizes, it's the common games and time spent together.

Since I am a mother, I see more and more how mothers rate each other, even though they are in exactly the same situation and know exactly how hard it can sometimes . Therefor let´s explain you 3 categories of mum´s.

Category no. 1: The nature-loving

Apart from organic food and vegan products, nothing else is out of the question. Baby clothes that are not 100% cotton are an absolute disaster. WHAT? Your child drinks something other than water? What kind of mother are you ?! So in this mother's round I am definitely out.... the reproachful looks that my child is drinking juice instead of water and in addition to eating out of a plastic bottle and even eating chocolate, of course shows that I must be a terrible mother. Because they have never tasted chocolate before or even tasted anything other than water before they hit the veggie hype & BIO diet :-). Of course, I'm not saying that making vegan choices or just grabbing organic food is bad, but you can overdo it with a child.

Category No 2: The Luxury Mommy

Who does not like to look great and be styled at any time. Except Gucci, Chanel & Co for themselves and of course also for the child nothing comes into question, which is not a luxury brand. This type of mommy looks great, but unfortunately their main occupation is shopping and showing the world the new stroller and the new expensive bag, while the nanny is running after the kid in the shopping mall. Of course the man is very proud of his wife, because she cares so much for the education of their common treasure. At least she maybe hired the nanny by herself.

Category No 3: The overstrained mum

Greasy hair, dirty clothes and nearly a nervous breakdown. Which mother does not know that? Phases in which everything is just too much and you do not know where to start ?! Household and children are often to much. But why do you have to show it to the whole world so obviously? Do you want pity or is it a cry for help? I do not know, but no matter how hard it sometimes is. One thing should not suffer at all: hygiene.

However, this kind of mother does not seem to be overstrained, but obviously does not attach much importance to hygiene to her as well as to the poor children. The screaming children often run unheard and misunderstood in all directions while the mother is smoking and tapping peaceful on her cell phone. 

Question: Why is everyone allowed to have children ?!

The list of mummy types is certainly infinitely longer, but now let's focus on the basics.

The myth: Good mother.

Our own childhood certainly shapes us very much in dealing with our own children, as we adopt certain patterns of our parents & grandparents. But what is a good mother ? Every child will surely confirm that his mum is the very best - without comparing you with others out there, right? Every mother knows, consciously or unconsciously, what her child needs!

By the time you realize what kind of crying it is. Does my child hurt something or is it just upset and angry? Exactly: We mothers know the reason of the perhaps sudden outburst of rage in the subway. It does not require any questions or looks from other mothers. You can almost feel serenity when your own child is slumbering peacefully or sitting in the stroller. But she could not have guessed that exactly her own child, who was just as calm as she was, would have exactly the same outbreak half an hour later. The fact that tantrums could be part of an important developmental step would only be an idea. What you do as a mother, is of course wrong and irresponsible for other mothers, because only their own path is the right one.

So I asked myself the question: Why do you judge those who should understand you best?

The good thing is that I found an answer for myself:

The answer is that I am trying every day to be the best mum in the world for my little Noah and everything I do is because it just feels right in this very moment. My feeling has never deceived me and as long as I listen to it and follow my intuition , I know that I've done absolutely nothing wrong.

Most do what they think has to be this way and not what they would like to do. Maybe you are just voted by other mothers because they would like to be as free as you are and doing all the nice things you do with your child. Play in the playground romping around or even pushing the stroller with high heels because it feels good. Who says you're just a good mum wearing sneakers? Maybe it´s only your own point of view.

But I know when it comes to my little Noah, and I see in his sparkling eyes and a beaming smile that I did everything right. Because we are all children or not, we long for freedom and happiness without being evaluated. And that's what helped me on my way to being not just a good mom, but the best mum for my child. I put on what I want, do what I want, allow him what I want and take his needs seriously and try to understand why he does not want something. Like everything in life, it's just a choice. Namely your choice. In my opinion, a bad mother is only if one neglects one's child and not if one has no time for the household or the laundry. Because what is more important than my child? "One should never forget that our everyday life is their childhood". So do not let anyone tell you anything or make you feel like you're not a good mother. Just ask your child and it will confirm that you are the BEST.

What would you like to do that will make you happy? Is there something YOU have always wanted to do, but did not dare?

If you like my post, I would be happy to comment.